Five Things That Never Happened To Ben Skywalker
by jansonpls
Summary: As the title suggests, AU. Guest appearances by Anakin Solo, Myri Antilles, pretty all of the surviving Solo-Skywalker clan, and that Jedi Temple chick. Written before we knew the Jedi Temple chick's name.


**one;**

"C'mon, Bennie, you can do better than that!"

Ben glared at the ground beneath him, then pushed up onto his feet again and called his lightsaber back to him with the Force.

"Don't _call_ me that," he insisted, spinning round to turn his glare on his cousin.

Anakin looked back at him with wide-eyed innocence, an expression well-honed in twenty-eight years. "Call you what? Your name?"

"That's not my name. My name is _Ben_."

"--_nie_," Anakin completed with a lopsided grin. "What, are you too old for that now?"

Ben didn't dignify that with a response. Instead, he shot Anakin another glare before turning his attention to the nicks in his lightsaber hilt.

Something sharp and hot hit his right shoulder and he cried out, threw himself to the floor and came up with the _snap-hiss_ of his lightsaber blade ... to stare at Anakin's smile again.

"You shot me," Ben said dumbly.

"Relax, it was the remote. _You_ weren't paying attention."

"You said the exercise was over!"

"The exercise is never over. I lied -- people do that. Lesson one."

"..._you're_ not supposed to."

"People don't always do what they're supposed to do. Lesson two."

Ben sighed and deactivated his blade, but didn't bother hooking his lightsaber back onto his belt. "It's over now, though, right?"

Anakin smiled again, and though Ben made an effort, he couldn't sense any duplicity. "Sure it is."

This time, Ben was ready when the remote went off again.

**two;**

He first saw her on the _Errant Venture_, when Jacen put him on duty monitoring the casinos.

(Booster Terrik had disapproved -- Ben was too young to bring him in any money, after all. But he relented when Jacen wryly said he'd give Ben plenty of credits for fizzade.)

Her hair was red -- not like his or his mother's, but a bright scarlet with purple streaks -- and she was dealing sabacc cards to two Alliance pilots. He felt a flash of alarmed recognition from her in the Force when she saw him, but her expression didn't change until she smiled at him.

"Want to join the game? I won't tell your parents."

"Uh."

Ben was starting to feel that there was a galaxywide conspiracy among older pretty girls to steal his entire vocabulary.

"You're Ben Skywalker, right? I've seen you on the Holonews."

The feeling that this wasn't the full truth brought Ben back to his senses and returned the power of speech to him. "Um, yes."

Well, part of it.

She smiled again. "Join in. Game's more fun with more people. These boys don't mind," she added, flashing another grin at the two pilots.

Ben thought that a pretty girl's smile was better than any Jedi Mind Trick; neither pilot said a word as he sat down at their table.

Slightly guiltily, he began, "I should really--"

"Standard rules, Cloud City variants, keep your eyes on my hands or my face and nowhere in between, boys. Oh, did you say something, Ben?"

"Uh," he said, suddenly missing his vocabulary again. He was transfixed by her smile and somehow wasn't offended by the amusement in her eyes. "Never mind."

"Pick up your cards, then."

"--right."

He left several hours later with a kiss on the cheek and the strangest feeling that he'd somehow done exactly the opposite of what Jacen had intended.

**three;**

"_Candles_, Captain Solo?"

"Yeah," Han growled at C-3PO. "You got a problem with that, Goldenrod?"

"Sir, are you quite sure this is safe? I recall that there were candles at Master Jacen and Mistress Jaina's twelfth lifeday, and--"

"Ben doesn't have any pets," Jaina pointed out quickly, putting a hand on her father's arm -- to stop him hammering the point firmly into Threepio's head, Ben felt sure.

"And _we_ don't have any carpets," Mara added with a wry grin; she glanced at Ben and winked. "Everyone should just be grateful Han didn't try to bake the cake himself, too."

"I'm afraid I couldn't appreciate the cake in any case," Threepio said in a tone that sounded apologetic.

Ben tried to hide his laughter behind his hand: his uncle had moved to stand behind Threepio and was miming choking the droid with both hands. Unfortunately, Leia saw and frowned at Han to make him stop. He did so, albeit clearly reluctantly, and waved at the huge cake in the centre of the table.

"All yours, kid."

Mara smiled -- less wryly this time -- and let go of Luke's hand to ruffle Ben's hair. "Think you can get all fifteen in one shot?"

"_Mom_," he whined, but didn't duck away from her hand. "Of course I can. Watch--"

And sure, maybe he used the Force a _little_ just to make certain, but he did get all of them ... and only knocked over two glasses in the process.

**four;**

"So," Ben said, and immediately flailed for something else to add.

He didn't come up with anything.

She smiled anyway, brightening her entire face and making her seem even prettier, and (self-consciously?) brushed a stray section of red hair behind her ear. "So," she echoed.

"--thanks," he said after a moment (and a furtive glance around to check that Lekauf _hadn't_ followed them to the plaza). "For helping a few weeks ago."

He didn't specify out loud, but gave an impression of a message and Jacen in the Force; she nodded with understanding and smiled again.

"You're welcome."

Ben nodded in return, uncertain again. He looked away, down at his legs swinging over the edge of the wall, and willed them to stop. Then he looked back at her -- and still didn't say anything.

(Lekauf had told him how to pay for things first, and how to tell what side to tilt his head for a kiss, and even -- in a low voice despite the emptiness of the lounge at the time -- where to get privacy for a few hours with no questions asked. But he hadn't explained to Ben exactly how to _talk_.)

"I like your hair," he blurted out, and turned red himself. "It's -- pretty."

("Compliments," his Uncle Han had told him tipsily at a party, back when he'd still thought girls were icky. "Tell 'em they're pretty, or their clothes look nice, y'know? They like that, anything like that -- just not anythin' Lando or Janson tells you.")

"Thanks," she said, blushing slightly as well (and it made her even prettier). "I got it cut. I tried doing a braid like you, but it didn't look as good."

Ben felt a slight thrill at that and grinned with sudden confidence. "I bet it looked great. Um ... do you wanna go get something to eat? I know a great takeout place a few blocks from here."

"Sure," she said with another smile, and accepted his hand as he helped her up -- and didn't let go afterwards. "I'd like that."

"Yeah," he agreed with a nervous smile. "Me, too."

**five;**

_"No way." Ben extended his free hand and summoned Jacen's still-ignited lightsaber. "This kill is _mine_."_

Before his father could stop him, he ran; he felt a hand brush his shoulder but shrugged it off and concentrated on Jacen, on the shadowy figure he could see in the beam of his wavering glowrod. His father had done most of the work, had turned Jacen into a scrambling mess barely held together in one piece, and for a moment Ben wanted to stop, wanted to given his cousin time to recover so he could do this _properly_, the way his mother tried.

_His mother_.

He let out a wordless cry and _leapt_, the green blade in his hand slashing at thin air as the shadow moved, and then his legs went out from under him and the light flickered and faded, the glowrod rolling away across the floor. He felt something tug at the lightsaber in his hand and snarled as he tightened his grip.

"Your hate," said a voice (and it sounded far too pleased with itself, far too smug and arrogant and _smirking_), "makes you strong."

"Yeah," Ben agreed, and slashed wildly at thin air again before stumbling to his feet.

"You think you can do this?"

Suddenly, Jacen was _there_, standing in front of him in the glow of his own lightsaber, black cape torn and tattered and his eyes -- more yellow than brown, but Ben didn't blink to clear his vision and check.

"You think," Jacen continued, "you can beat me? You're a _child_--"

"You talk too much," Ben growled, and rushed forward again, not bothering to try and catch his cousin by surprise; this was a feint, and Jacen fell for it, moving to the side -- it didn't matter which side -- and stumbling from the injuries Ben's father had inflicted.

With another angry wordless cry, Ben _pushed_ with the Force and Jacen stumbled more, fell, followed by his own blade, unable to block it.

Ben felt Jacen reach out with the Force and for a moment, he didn't see his cousin on the floor at all. He saw his uncle, his father, his mother--

--but he didn't hesitate.

He brought the blade down anyway, barely seeing anything at all with his eyes, trusting in the Force (and that darkness, that loving-hating-happy-angry darkness) to guide him.

"Heh."

He stepped back, wiping his mouth with the back of his free hand (it tasted like blood; how had that happened?) and staring at the lifeless body of Jacen Solo.

"Maybe I _am_ like you."

He held up the lightsaber in his hand to study it for a moment, then lowered it without deactivating the blade and looked back at Jacen.

"But I'm still Ben Skywalker."


End file.
